lately i feel very alone and betrayed. i don't know why, but i just feel very alone.... and for some reason i feel like he's gone and done something that he knows i won't be very happy about. i'm wondering if he really is working as much as he says he is. yeah, i know he's broke.... but he didn't even manage to find a way to call me yesterday! maybe he still feels bad about my birthday, but really..... i think i've been more understanding than most girls would be, at leasst it hink so.... i don't know.... sometimes i think i'm going to go insane..... i really don't know what i'd do here with out him. but i know that theres something just not right here, i just don't know what.... i'm hoping that he's just feeling bad 'cause he wasn't able to buy me a birthday present or a valentines present.... but really, i don't mind! but he doesn't seem to understand that... i told him that all i wanted for valentines day was to spend some time with just him. and he hasn't been able to do that for me.... *sigh* i'll figure it all out eventually. but until then i think it's just stairing blankly out the window and waiting for him to call me.... which is quite pathetic i know.... but my calling card is gone and his cell is long distance, that is if he's at work.... and i don't want to call his house and get brian, or worse, michelle, 'cause they both manage to find a way to make me feel really bad. it will all sort itself out in the end, it has to....

<>< Julianne

bye bye diaryland - Monday, Nov. 08, 2004
shit - Wednesday, Nov. 03, 2004
my eye hurts - Tuesday, Oct. 05, 2004
no phone, no internet - Sunday, Aug. 22, 2004
wtf mate? - Sunday, Aug. 08, 2004